A Small Moral Lesson

I am all for people having opinions. And, please, by all means, share them! We live in the good old U. S. of A. for crying out loud! It's our birthright to spout off every thought that comes into our head, right?

Right??!

Oh, except when you start to shove your opinion down my throat and make me feel like I am a lesser form of human life, somehow, because MY opinion doesn't match YOURS. (One of the reasons I can't STAND watching those talk-news channels--they're almost just as bad as a lively Jerry Springer show with all the shouting and interrupting they do. It's probably a good thing most conversations take place via satellite--or I'm sure there would be some fists flying on Fox News.)

Anyway.

Yesterday I took the kids to their tennis lesson. We've just started and so far, the coaches (it's a husband-and-wife pair, who have no kids of their own) have been really good with the kids. Always encouraging, really positive; just generally a good match for my kids' ability and interest level. So I've been pleased.

Until yesterday.

K mentioned that I was going to have another baby to her Mrs. Coach. Mrs. Coach immediately turned to me (from across the court) and said, "You are going to have another BABY??!"

Now her tone was a bit questionable, but I chose to interpret it as a happy, excited, surprised tone. I mean, she was coaching M and K and had seen me chasing after X during lessons, so she knows how many kids I have, and that together, they can sometimes be a handful (although sometimes just ONE kid can be a handful! . . . but whatev). I was trying to ignore the fact that her question sounded a little accusatory and as if she were questioning my sanity.

"Yeah," I replied with a big smile. "We're really excited!"

"Oh my...! I just can't believe you're having another BABY!! Are you CRAZY??!" All said with a big smile plastered on her face. To soften the blow, of course, that according to her, I AM crazy and should seek professional help as soon as possible.

"Yeah, well, heh heh . . . " faded smile. Blink. (Sorry, Lady. I'm not going to discuss my family planning with the tennis coach across the court.)

"I mean, WOW! That's crazy! Another baby! Well, I guess you already have all the baby stuff you need, though, right?"

Right. Because I've got baby items that still have use left in them. THAT'S why we're having another kid.

She seriously went on for another few minutes, and I just kind of sat there, waiting for her to stop.

WHAT am I supposed to say to this? And how is it ANY of this woman's business? You know what? You don't want kids, you don't want a certain number of kids, that is FINE WITH ME. I would NEVER say to her (or anyone for that matter) "You are insane for NOT having kids (or more kids)! I mean, kids are what make life meaningful! You are so selfish if you don't have kids!" Everyone makes the choice that fits best for them and their family.

What if I had NOT wanted another baby? Can you imagine? For her to say something like that? The point is, she doesn't know me well enough to be spouting off like she did and it bugged.

So the moral lesson? Of course it is okay to have an opinion. But part of being a grown-up is knowing appropriate time and place to express your opinion. What makes America good is that we can express our opinions; what makes this country great is when we respect others' opinions, even when they don't match our own. (Take note, Cable News channels!)

Oh, and back off tennis lady!